April Joyner

Bryce Roberts puts a new spin on the au courant saying that kids now “get a trophy just for showing up”:

Fact of the matter was, our kids weren’t tired or hungry and probably could have held off a bathroom break until after the show finished. We were making excuses for them. Because, if they really were just brats that might hurt their self esteem, or worse, reflect poorly on us as parents.

The Atlantic has a fantastic piece every parent should read. In it the author, a psychiatrist, outlines a new phenomenon arising in her field: young adults from terrific homes with loving parents packed full of talent were showing up in her office feeling lost, adrift, unfulfilled.

She goes on to trace these feelings to a societal shift in parenting styles. Parents who once wanted respect from their kids, now desperately want to be their BFF. And in doing so, seem to be creating unintended second order effects.

[….]

Pulling this behavior forward, I’m beginning to see this parenting style taking root in startup culture.

As investor FOMO and entrepreneurial access to capital have increased, so too has the level of entitlement to that capital. Swap the trophy for a seed round, and that’s directionally where things are headed in startupland. Everyone gets a seed round. Everyone gets to be CEO. Everyone starts a billion dollar company. Everyone can be the next Zuckerberg.

My question: who exactly are these kids who are so coddled nowadays? This trend seems to exist almost exclusively among white, middle-to-upper-class families. But then, of course, it’s mainly their children who are the recipients of VC funding. So for them, Bryce’s post is very valid. The rest of us—entrepreneurs and employees—get rewarded according to the old rules: work ten times harder, and just maybe you’ll get a trophy.